Two faces in a coin
I haven't been updating my journal for a long time; I don't have a computer at home. My computer needs fixing and I don't have the money yet. Lately, I've been busy as a web designer and as a GM. Now that a lot of people know that I am a GM in Level Up! It doesn't seem to be so bad, right after that match "GM vs. RPC all stars". I still have friends in the game and they are still true to me. Some gave me a lot of attention and some gave me annoyance.
As a GM in Ragnarok - I am not really a GM that takes calls from players, I only show up as a GM on events like the RPC. I'd be the one behind that in-game camera watching over the players and that's it. No other effort.
As a Gamer - No, I’m not a real gamer per say. I only got addicted to the game Ragnarok because it was there. My friend, Ilog, showed me how to play Counter Strike back in college but I never really looked for the game everyday. After I get home from school, a friend from college would call me up to have a one on one match with him in Star Craft. I remember calling three of my batch mates "the chain gang." Whom one of them now is a member in a band called "Kamikaze." I was somewhat un-defeat able when it comes to a 1 on 1 match but that was the old days. Then I graduated from college and started working as a web designer. Then, a friend of mine showed me the game Ragnarok. I still play the game but only in Sakray. I rarely mingle in the main servers anymore since I’ve gotten used to having much more fun in Sakray than dealing with jerks and so-called 'Jologs.' I've pulled most of my trusted in-game friends out of Chaos server and in Sakray. Now, I’m a guild master of two huge guilds that are good and nice. Most of them became play testers and even a GPE (Game Play Expert). All of us would talk about geeky stuff like tactics and different builds. Then sometimes even role playing. When I say role-plays, we role-play like in "Dungeon's & Dragon's"; act out our characters. But then again, one cannot just lie away from who you are. It’s really different from rolling a die and having almost an hour to just decide on a five to ten minute move.
Thoughts in my personal life - A lot of my friends would ask me if I still have a boyfriend and I don’t know what to say. Most of them are saying to just let go, but it's not that easy. I love the guy for Christ-sake. And I haven't forgotten about him but it seemed that he has forgotten about me. No calls; no text messaged; no hi or hello's; no, nothing. Then, I keep asking myself, what if I drop by his in his office. What will happen then? I'm still afraid that he might get mad at me as he already is for asking one of my co-workers to kindly ask one of her friend to remind Don of something. Ah well, life is weird but at least I'm still alive.
Another funny thing about me is that I have this phobia.
But I have to cope with it right? The way I do it is that I always try to keep my mine busy, thinking of other things. Making jokes with friends and just try to have fun even if I most of the time shiver inside. And most often when people ask me out, I'd give excuses that I have other things to do, even if I don't. heh... such a life, ne?
As a GM in Ragnarok - I am not really a GM that takes calls from players, I only show up as a GM on events like the RPC. I'd be the one behind that in-game camera watching over the players and that's it. No other effort.
As a Gamer - No, I’m not a real gamer per say. I only got addicted to the game Ragnarok because it was there. My friend, Ilog, showed me how to play Counter Strike back in college but I never really looked for the game everyday. After I get home from school, a friend from college would call me up to have a one on one match with him in Star Craft. I remember calling three of my batch mates "the chain gang." Whom one of them now is a member in a band called "Kamikaze." I was somewhat un-defeat able when it comes to a 1 on 1 match but that was the old days. Then I graduated from college and started working as a web designer. Then, a friend of mine showed me the game Ragnarok. I still play the game but only in Sakray. I rarely mingle in the main servers anymore since I’ve gotten used to having much more fun in Sakray than dealing with jerks and so-called 'Jologs.' I've pulled most of my trusted in-game friends out of Chaos server and in Sakray. Now, I’m a guild master of two huge guilds that are good and nice. Most of them became play testers and even a GPE (Game Play Expert). All of us would talk about geeky stuff like tactics and different builds. Then sometimes even role playing. When I say role-plays, we role-play like in "Dungeon's & Dragon's"; act out our characters. But then again, one cannot just lie away from who you are. It’s really different from rolling a die and having almost an hour to just decide on a five to ten minute move.
Thoughts in my personal life - A lot of my friends would ask me if I still have a boyfriend and I don’t know what to say. Most of them are saying to just let go, but it's not that easy. I love the guy for Christ-sake. And I haven't forgotten about him but it seemed that he has forgotten about me. No calls; no text messaged; no hi or hello's; no, nothing. Then, I keep asking myself, what if I drop by his in his office. What will happen then? I'm still afraid that he might get mad at me as he already is for asking one of my co-workers to kindly ask one of her friend to remind Don of something. Ah well, life is weird but at least I'm still alive.
Another funny thing about me is that I have this phobia.
But I have to cope with it right? The way I do it is that I always try to keep my mine busy, thinking of other things. Making jokes with friends and just try to have fun even if I most of the time shiver inside. And most often when people ask me out, I'd give excuses that I have other things to do, even if I don't. heh... such a life, ne?
Comments
(really wish i didnt miss the 10x period. nutmonkeys. T_T)